Let me start by saying that bulls have the best life on the ranch. There are only a few bulls to uh, em, service a very high number of cows. Life is good. If they had t-shirts, that's what they'd say. But life is not so great this time of year.
This weekend was bull testing. Bull testing is necessary to see if they are capable of taking care of the cows. If not, that's really bad news. It is so important to a cow/calf operation to have the females calving. If the bull is no good, he's off to the feedlot.
Bulls are run through the chutes to be checked. That is the nice part. What happens next is the part where you need to send the little ones out of the room. It's probably not the best topic for little ears, even though all of our children have witnessed/helped with this before. I guess that's life when you're part of a family ranch. It's important to desensitize them early.
Are they out? The cowboys then place a large, black electric probe in the bull's rectum to stimulate the bull into releasing his specimen into a condom like contraption. This looks either really, really painful or quite the opposite. They often fall to their knees after the jolt. I'm guessing that it's a painful thing, because they usually get out of the chutes and are fighting mad. Are the children still out of the room? I feel I must tell you the name of previously mentioned probe. The guys call him Jamal. I'm sorry. I'm moving on from this. How could I know that and not share? I'm amused that they felt it needed a name.
Once the specimen is, uh, harvested, it is viewed under a microscope to see just how potent he is. This is the really boring part of working the bulls. There is a lot of sitting around and waiting while the vet examines the semen.
Knowing what you know now, aren't you a little sad you can't see just a few quick pictures so you can fully appreciate the fact that you don't have to check the bulls? Don't lie.
Hey, if you're really that sad, maybe you can come out next year to help. We could always use an extra pair of hands. If you're really lucky, they might even let you operate Jamal.
Oh, and this guy isn't wearing green. Feel free to pinch him. Happy St. Patrick's Day!
